Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Max at 5.5 Months and Motherhood

Usually around the turn of a new month I officially declare Max's 1/2 month birthday. Not that I celebrate this, I just start saying that he is 5 1/2 months, rather than just 5. Hey, at least I don't talk in weeks. 

Max5 5months

Max's newest talent is the ability to roll from back to front, which he mastered this past Wednesday (or at least showed us ha ha). He continues to love to put everything in his mouth. Eric calls it Max's game of "Can I Shove It In My Mouth?" 

He is also currently in love with his jumper that he is borrowing from his BFF Teddy. 

Max5 5months 2

Speaking of friends, Max gained 2 new ones in the month of June. Here he is playing with my friend Tiff's new baby Wes. By playing I obviously meaning hitting, because boys will be boys. 

Max5 5months 4

Max's other new friend Mira was born last week to my friend Sarah. Max and Mira share a few things in common though: they both came early with a sweet tan and both names begin with M :) Since Mira is a girl, Max decided to be a gentlemen (or a total flirt) and put his arm around her instead of smacking. What a guy. 

Photo1

Max also thinks if he looks the other way we won't notice him putting the moves on a 9 day old baby… c'mon Max. 

So Max continues to be both hilarious, and a delight. 

As for his mom? I'm a bit of a wild card. I think we can all agree that I went into motherhood with realistic expectations. I never once expected it to be all sunshine and rainbows. In fact, I have always declared that I wanted to miraculously be the dad so I could skip the whole pregnancy and breastfeeding aspect of parenthood. Clearly, nothing has changed my mind about that. I love Max. I love spending time with him, I love reading to him, I love making him laugh, I love seeing him accomplish new things. I do not love: losing sleep, having no time to myself at all, needing to put in 7x the amount of effort that should be required to get in a workout, having my "break" from the baby be carrying around a pump and finding a place to pump then washing the pump parts etc, trying to do research on the best way to do x, y and z and finding out over and over that there is no best way so you just have to try 67 things but also don't forget to be consistent somehow while doing 67 things because consistency is key… whew. I could go on, but I won't. 

I get it. It comes with the territory, if you want the good you have to put in the effort. There are so many things that I love to do that I don't love every second of the day every time (teaching kindergarten, being married, owning a house, even going on vacation is not sunshine and rainbows all the time!) But this will not stop me from throwing a minor hissy fit when I do all these things for Max and Eric watches him for one morning while I'm at work and he decides to choose that moment to roll over the other way. Sigh. The rational side of me knows that it doesn't matter who was there the "first time" he does everything because no matter what it is going to be so exciting the first time I see it. I also know that while I should be with Max quite a bit this summer, I still won't be with him every second of the time (nor should I be) so who knows what I will see/miss and that is life. 

So that is where I am. And if you are going to start your comment with "just wait" followed by any kind of negative comment such as "until Max is walking and you are even more exhausted," please resist. I need some positivity at the moment :) Please and thank you. 

 

8 comments:

  1. First let me say--You are doing a FABULOUS job at being a mommy! Your words ring so true! There are so many good things that come from being a parent--but it is also exhausting and frustrating and overwhelming at times. See--just re-reading your part about the lack of sleep, pumping, and washing all those pump pieces made me think "Hmmm...do we REALLY want to start all over again??" as we are trying to get pregnant with #2. Of course--we DO want to have another little one--but yeah--you kind of start to forget about all that comes in the beginning....and are like "OMG--are we crazy to do it again???" Welles is getting to be so independent these days----and it's really fun! But--just like you said-- anything good comes with effort!

    I know you've told me before you have a lot of good, positive mommy (and non mommy) friends in your life so that makes me happy because hopefully their support will keep you going when you have less than stellar moments!

    And this isn't the same as your "first time" story--but yesterday Welles told me "Daddy no work! Mommy go to work. Daddy home" I wanted to cry because he wanted Daddy to stay home with him--not me! LOL. Jason tried to make me feel better and just said it's because he is with me all day every day now and seeing Jason less--but still!!!!!

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  2. I think you're doing amazing. Just keep breathing.

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  3. ((()) A just wait comment is a justifable murder excuse. Max is so photogenic! I love the first picture and the pictures of him meeting his new friends! Mothering and finding your personal okay levels is a constant struggle. I may have told my husband last week that I will always wish I was a boy, being a girl sucks hardcore. And then i think about the negative image that sends about females but dude we get the raw end of a lot of deals and when I'm bleeding from my vagina while camping, ain't nobody messing with me!

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  4. I love your comment about wanting to be a dad. I have had many conversations with John trying to explain how EVERYTHING is different in my life since becoming a mom and his life has a lot more consistency. I still don't think he gets it.

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  5. I really hate 'just wait' or 'it could be worse' type of comments! They are just not supportive. I think you do a great job of being positive but also keeping it real! Which I think is important as I am sure there are others out there who feel the exact same way as you do, but they probably see more 'oh my God, motherhood is amazing' posts instead of 'dang this is hard' posts. So hopefully by keeping it real, others feel a little bit less alone.

    There are a lot of times that I wish I could have some of the benefits of being a man - especially in my male dominated work environment. Or in terms of relationships and how many questions (some that are totally inappropriate/none of the person's business) I get compared to Phil. He never gets a slew of questions, whereas I always seem to. End rant.

    All that said, Max is adorable so keep the pictures coming. And look at him hitting on his little friend already. He's going to be a charmer! And again, I can not get over how BIG Max looks! What is his height percentile? He seems longer than the average baby!

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  6. I agree with everyone who said that "just wait" or "it could be worse" comments are the WORST. And like Lisa said, not supportive at all. I am someone who always tries to see the silver lining but sometimes it's worth admitting that certain parts of life (actually most parts of life) are a) hard and b) take a lot of work. Like you said, at least you went into motherhood with real expectations! At least Max is so darn cute, I think I saw you say this in a comment somewhere and I totally agree that that is why babies/kids are so darn cute because then we'll still love them despite all the work that comes with them. Lol. Keep breathing, taking it one day at a time and allow yourself to vent as much as needed!

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  7. "...if you want the good you have to put in the effort."

    This the best parenting description, ever. The end.

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  8. I just have to commend you on being realistic. You are amazing to juggle what you do. Mom, teacher, wife, athlete, friend, daughter, homeowner, and the list goes on! I have MAJOR fears about having children - and it revolves around time (or lack there-of). So reading your post is good for me. Because you are confirming that my fears are, indeed, valid. But you also instill hope that it's do-able! Doesn't come without obstacles and challenges, though.

    Every phase as Max will have it's unique challenges - and 1st time motherhood has a HUGE learning curve!

    Your little man is adorable - and his personal shines through in the pictures!

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