I expected being a mom to be really hard. I expected a flood of the baby blues and a lot of crying. It is hard, but not at all in the way I expected.
It turns out the actual mom part has been easier than I thought. I can change diapers easily, even with a squirmy newborn. Sleep has been a challenge but I haven't missed out on it entirely. Eric and my mom have basically taken over the household and we have had so much support from family and friends. So grateful for that. It also does not hurt that I love Max so much it barely even bothers me to pry myself from the bed (a challenge in itself) at 3am. Breast feeding is going well considering he was born so early. I almost don't mind it other than the fact that I feel like that's all I do all day long.
What has been hard can be summed up as: my body. It is a mess. At the hospital I didn't change a single diaper because standing up was so difficult. When I got home it seemed to get better so slowly I could barely see a difference. Yesterday the pain started to get a little better but I felt myself mentally slipping. I was convinced the honeymoon was over and I was having delayed baby blues. But then I decided to take my temp and guess what it was 104! Cue tears and freak out. I found myself back in Labor and Delivery and they ran a million tests on me. As of now they think it's mastitis so I started antibiotics last night. By some miracle Max, the best baby ever, decided not to have his middle of the night fussy spell and he slept all night except to eat. Love him.
My fever is now down to 100 so I'm hoping I am on the mend and maybe this will be the end of my issues. Of course I am thankful it's not th baby with a 104 temp!
If nothing else it's impossible to be even slightly angry at this...