The Scrooge of Theme Parties

Just call me the Scrooge of "Theme Parties."

I strongly dislike Theme Parties.

Let me start by saying, there is a place for "theme parties." I support them fully when they are done in the kindergarten classroom. Tomorrow is "Sports Day" in my classroom. I have an awesome little boy moving to Washington state on Friday and tomorrow is his last day at school (which I am REALLY sad about). I gave him a choice between a bunch of theme days and he picked "Sports Day." I asked the parents for indoor sports so we have some "gator" golf, bean bag toss, trampoline, hula hoops and a sports memory game (yea not a sport itself but I needed some activities the kids could do independently while I guard the trampoline with my life). The kids are all going to dress up in sports gear. Is this going to be awesomely fun and hopefully something he remembers for awhile as he transitions to a new town/school? I hope so!!!! At the end of the year I do a full out ABC Countdown where every single day is a theme of some sort from Career Day, to Pajama Day (which usually makes an appearance a few times a year), to Water Day and so on. Like I said, there is a place for Theme Parties.

However, as an adult Theme Parties kind of annoy me for a few reasons...

#1- It seems the general plan of a "theme" party is to make the party goers look as ridiculous as possible. Wear your ugliest Christmas sweater? Yup. 80s party? Yup. Maybe it's just me, but I spend plenty of time not looking awesome. Pretty much every weekday when I fall out of bed, take the fastest shower imaginable while still getting clean, throw on the first clean clothes I see, etc. On the weekend, if I am going to go out I don't want to go out wearing an ugly sweater, I want to wear a beautiful sparkly sweater that I don't get to wear too often. I want to possibly look like for once I did not fall out of bed. It's actually unlike me to care all that much how I look, but it's nice to spend more than 5 seconds getting ready every once in awhile.

#2- Clearly I do not object to the time and money I invest in theme parties for kindergarten kids, but I really have no desire to actually go out and BUY an ugly sweater. That's time and money I could've spent on NICE clothes, or I don't know... not shopping at all?!

#3- There is a certain kind of weird "pressure" involved in these parties. If, God forbid you sweater is not ugly ENOUGH, you will go to the party and people will give you crap. This even happens to Eric and let's face it... WHERE are you going to find a Christmas sweater made for a 6'4" former football player?! C'mon people!

It may seem like, in fact, I don't hate theme parties but rather just ugly sweater parties and I have to say it seems like that because that is the theme party I am invited to most frequently. It's getting to the point that it has really be overdone. Though it is becoming more clear that I should've just invested in a damn ugly sweater in the first place. Maybe I do only hate ugly sweater parties... I wouldn't object to a pajama party...

All I can say is, on Friday I am attending an ugly sweater party (followed by a normal 30th birthday party which I will clearly be changing before). All it said on the invitation was to wear "festive" attire (because no one EVER calls an ugly sweater party what it is!). Therefore, I will be wearing my awesome new sequin uggs, with red leggings, a not-at-all ugly white sweater dress and MAYBE just maybe if I feel particularly festive the pink sequin Santa hat will come out. If I can figure out how to get rid of hat hair before the normal party. Give me as much crap as you want crazy theme-loving people. I will stand my ground. Ugly sweaters will not be making a reappearance in my life until I have adorable little kiddos that I can dress in matching sweaters. And then they won't be called ugly, they will be called precious :)

End rant.